Curriculum and adults with severe cognitive disabilities

I had a discussion with a leader in disability ministry the other day.  We were discussing what curricula might look like for an adult with a severe cognitive disability.  The person I spoke with indicated that they will use stuffed animals that the adults can manipulate while they are teaching about the story of Noah's Ark.  As I listened, it struck me that the approach was misguided on many levels.  Please understand that I bless that person and the work that they are doing, however, I also understand, I think, alternative means to work with that particular population: adults with severe cognitive disabilities.  Lets consider a few aspects where I believe this approach is wrong.

First, in all of our interactions with people with disabilities, we should treat them in an age appropriate manner.  If we are not age appropriate, we stigmatize people.  Adults treated as children are trivialized and dismissed.  So the first problem is age appropriateness.  When classes for adults without disabilities start using stuffed animals to teach Bible stories, or have adults color pictures, or do whatever else children do but adults don't typically do, when that happens, then I will consider doing that with adults with cognitive disabilities.

Second is the whole story of Noah's Ark.  What relevance could this story possibly have to the life of adults with cognitive disabilities?  These are people who struggle with the most basic of understanding.  Yet we will teach them about Noah, and assume they understand that that is the name of a man who lived a couple of thousand years ago.  The assumptions here, boggle the mind.  The assumption is that they will generalize the fact that these little stuffed soft things represent real live animals, when we know that a characteristic of people with severe disabilities is that they cannot generalize such information.  Need I go on?  The animals enter in groups of two...what is a two?  They are male and female...what is male and female?  The world was destroyed by a flood...what is a flood?  Because of the sin in the world...what is a world and what is sin?  The disconnection between the story and the life and understanding of a person with a disability is staggering.  Yet we dutifully teach the story of the creation, or Noah, or whatever.  I remember being in a Sunday school class one time where the lesson was about how David could have killed Saul but didn't, just cutting off a piece of his robe.  Or a lesson on the fact that God is eternal.  I can barely understand that one myself.  That lesson was particularly memorable as when the teacher said "God is eternal" a dear woman with down's syndrome turned to me and said, "What is this God is a turtle stuff?"

When I called the teacher on these things, the response was that "The Holy Spirit will fill in the gaps."  So I am to teach with my plan being that God will do a miracle every time because I am unwilling to teach in a way that works with the people at the level they are on.  That I should plan for a miracle for their to be any understanding for a severely cognitively disabled person in a Sunday school class.

But you might say, "Well what would you teach about then?"

I am not sure I would deliver any specific content, knowledge to people with severe cognitive disabilities.  I think that is part of the problem with the way we do most things at church.  Everything is knowledge based.  So when it is time to teach the severely disabled people, we have to be knowledge based.  Well that is pretty silly to my way of thinking.  Maybe I would tell them that Jesus loves you.  They may not understand who Jesus is, but to teach a person that someone loves them is a good thing.  If a person could only repeat the phrase "Jesus loves you" would be a good lesson to learn.  But as I said, I might not even do that.  My current efforts in a church program that includes people with severe cognitive disabilities, is to let them know that I love them.  That I am glad to see them.  That I call them my friend.  Then we eat a lot of good food together, and hug each other and enjoy a few minutes together.  They learn that they are a part of something where they are loved and they are welcomed. 

One man in our group (I have mentioned him elsewhere in this blog) is a great guy named Eddie.  Because I know Eddie, I know the few words he speaks.  When we are together, I use them with him.  So he might initiate a conversation with me, or I with him using his words.  So I say to him "Christmas" and he replies "Christmas."  He then says "Ho ho ho" making a characteristic gesture, which I repeat.  He says "Toys" to which I respond "Toys, you like cars." He responds, "Cars."  He is with someone who is listening to him and he is listening to me.  It is funny because as I am teaching a lesson to a group of perhaps 70 people, he will leave his seat and come up to me, and we engage in this conversation.  He has complete access to me at any time, and we talk about the things that are important to him.  In addition, although the topic of our conversation is somewhat juvenile, our conversation is not juvenile.  If you couldn't hear what we were talking about, you would just think we are a couple of old friends having a good time talking together.  It is interesting that recently he has infused the word "Bible" into his conversation so I am on the lookout for a good picture Bible.  He has noticed that people open a book when we are in our group, and they call it a Bible.  He wants one too, so he will get one.  But not because I plan to impart any Biblical knowledge to him other than that "Jesus loves you" and that "I love you." 

I still look to God's Holy Spirit to help, but the assistance is that Eddie will know that I love him and that Jesus loves him.  Not that he will be able to engage in Biblical interpretation and application.

McNair

The Power of Professional Opinion

I was told of yet another situation where a human service professional made a pronouncement about what a person who is disabled would never do. We have all heard those pronouncements...
"He will never walk"
"He will never read"
"He will never have a normal life"
and the worst of all
"He will always be a vegatable"

Each of these statements are offensive and cruel in their own right, but they are particularly hurtful as they come from people who are perceived to be "in the know" about something. They are the professionals, the experts. However, I would contend that they are definitely not either professional or expert because someone with the life experience to go along with professional training would never say such things. When I hear of such statements, my response is not that the person making the statement is a professional. My response is that the person making such statements is a mess. He is a person using a position of power to destroy the hope of desperate people; be they the individual about whom the pronouncement is made or that persons loved ones and family. How can one respond to such pronouncements with other than grief?

But we probably all have known people who were told they would never walk, or never speak, or never whatever who are now walking or speaking or doing the thing they would never do. Because we believe the professionals, we call the fact that the people can do what they were not supposed to do miracles and I don't doubt that many people do experience miracles in their lives. I would be the last one to tell you that if you have been healed of something or are now able to do something that no one thought you would be able to do that you have experienced something miraculous in your life. But I would be the first to say that the pronouncement made by supposed professionals which may have led you to believe that your natural healing (which in itself is a miracle of sorts) have a good chance of being flawed.

I personally know, for example, a person who a doctor said was in a "persistant vegetative state" (I hate that phrase...calling someone a vegegable only provides an excuse for that person to be treated as something other than a human being) and was supposed to remain in such a state for the remainder of the person's life. Well, that person is a very active individual right now. Sure there are remaining evidences of the original disability, but if that person is in a vegetative state, than he is the first green bean that I have ever met who can communicate, respond to God, lead others to understand God and disability through emails and personal discussions, take care of their needs, and do a myriad of other things.

I could write all day on the whole idea of professionals, particularly medical professionals and down's syndrome. Man, is there a lot of misinformation being given about people with down's syndrome by medical and other professionals. Particularly those linked to the abortion industry. As one of my professors, Dr. Bob Henderson, used to state about ill informed people, "unencumbered by knowledge, he speaks with great authority." But I may have never known a person with down's syndrome personally, yet I can make all kinds of prounouncements about who people with down's syndrome are.

I will also tell you that there have been a couple of times in my life when I have been in the presence of someone making a pronouncement about what someone will never do. The last time was when I was discussing how a teacher could help a young man with severe cognitive disabilities develop some basic speech. As the child stood before us, the teacher said, "He will never be able to communicate through speech." I went off on the teacher. In a nut shell, I said "How dare you say such a thing! How do you know what Johnny (not his name) will or won't do! I suspect as well if he does not develop the ability to speak while you are his teacher it is probably your fault, not his!..." Anyway, the teacher apologized to me and to Johnny and I think that was a teachable moment. How much easier if the teacher has responded, "I would love to help Johnny to communicate through speech. How can we make that happen?" How hard would that have been?

But it is true with all of the "he will never..." pronouncements. Why not say, "Here are some ideas of what you might do to help him so that he might be able to walk again, or speak again or whatever again." "Here are some ideas of things you might do stimulate or potentially engage your family member who is in a comatose state." In none of the statements did I say that the person would get better. All I did was present the possibility of improvement and gave both the individual with disability and the family some hope. If the were to ask me, "Will Johnny ever walk again?" My response would be, "I really don't know. There are some people who have been able to recover, but they are very rare. Here are some ideas of things you might want to try to help him."

The other side of professional opinion, is the incredible good which can come from what a professional may say to people to encourage or praise them. I have experienced many occasions where I will have made some comment to someone that literally impacted their lives. Perhaps I said to an instructional assistant in a special education classroom that she has a knack for working with children with autism and ought to consider becoming a teacher. Five years later that person approaches me to say that that small comment was the spark that caused her to go back to school to get a credential. Or perhaps something is said to a person with a disability, or even a simple act of kindness, something that you don't give a second thought about, that impacts someone for the good.

Those of you who are professionals who might be reading this must remember the impact you have on people by the things you say. Now obviously you shouldn't tell people things that are not the truth. But you must also temper what you say with the fact that you do not absolutely know what will happen in the future for a person, so if you must err, err on the side of being hopeful.

McNair

The importance of language

I have been thinking about the importance of the language we as professionals (those of you who are professionals) or those of us who are just in the know (those of you who are in the know) in our interactions with persons with cognitive disabilities. We can contribute to the devaluing of people, or we can assist in minimizing their devaluation simply by the language we use.

I have a particular responsibility as a trainer of teachers of students with severe disabilities. I am in the sometimes unenviable position of training community experts (teachers). I love that opportunity, but there is great responsibility that comes with that opportunity. I have to be very circumscribed in the language I use, because it will be copied by the community experts I am training, and then modeled for the community. I am therefore very, VERY sensitive about issues of language.

Don't get me wrong, I am constantly joking with my friends with cognitive disabilities. We call each other turkey or old goat. It was particularly fun when I learned the ASL sign for turkey cause now I can tease friends across the sanctuary during church! We tease, but I am careful to tease in a way that does not demean, or particularly in a way that might be misconstrued as being a jab at their disability. If I err, which I sometimes do, I am quick to apologize to the person and to those listening.

I personally also do like to use the phrase, "people with___" when necessary to describe a person with a disability. There are those who reject the phrase as being politically correct, or not being a correct use of the English language. However, I embrace the phrase, I embrace its cumbersome nature, because it once again reminds both me and those listening that I see the person I am speaking about by using the phrase as a person first (the reason for the phrasing).

We also don't want to give people permission to use demeaning language by laughing at their jokes, however well intentioned, or not calling them on their use of language. I remember once getting into a cab in the pouring rain. I was soaked. When I got into the cab, I said to the driver, "I am sorry I am getting your seat all wet." He responded, "Well at least you aren't a (racial slur)." I responded, "Pull the car over I'm getting out" and did so. Perhaps in the future he would not be so quick to assume racist comments were acceptable.

However we do similar kinds of things in our language about disability. In the previous entry, I pointed out a video where the speaker explains the use of the word "retard" or the phrase, "don't be retarded" as derogatory phrases basically equivalent to ethnic slurs. However, it can be much more subtle than that. Jokes about about low intelligence can be subtle, but should not be tolerated. But if we don't speak up about such uses of language, we can be sure that no one else will. We are the experts. We should be setting the tone. If nothing else, negative language will be curtailed or at least apologized for in our presence, and both the speaker and listeners will be exposed to the potentially damaging nature of language.

Finally, language may be considered "juvenile" but must be taken with the seriousness with which it is communicated. I had a delightful time riding home from the beach this past Sunday with a friend. He is a man about 45, but his language is limited to phrases like "Santa Claus" or "Christmas" or "toys" or "cars" or "candy" or "comer" or "Ho Ho Ho" or "Christmas tree." Obviously he is someone who particularly enjoys the Christmas holidays based on his language alone. As I sat with him I had a 20 minute discussion which centered on these phrases, but was as adult as possible. I didn't treat his discussion of "toys" as cute or juvenile. I discussed toys with him in the same manner I would discuss the Lakers with another friend, or music with another friend. It was like I attempted to validate his language choice by my interest, my participation in his language and the seriousness with which he discussed the subject. He was very intent on cars for example, and would literally grab my face to turn it toward him to tell me the word cars, and he wasn't laughing. My response was to have that discussion with him in a respectful adult manner. I am sure people around me thought the whole thing a bit ridiculous, but at the same time, he had my undivided attention. If someone tried to interject something, I would respond, "Excuse me I am talking to Eddie." The importance of his perspective, his preferences, his opinions was validated by my interest.

McNair
(fcbu)

Defining the meaning behind the word "retard"

I found a video at a weblog called Kei Unlimited. It describes the use of the word "retard" from the perspective of the brother of a girl with down's syndrome. The speaker's name is Soeren Palumbo Fremd.

I thought I would share it here. You can view it at the bottom of the page.

The weblog address is,
http://kei-unlimited.blogspot.com/2007/08/heroes.html

McNair

(fcbu)

300 postings at disabled Christianity

The following is from the first posting I made on this blog...

I was recently visiting another blog (nicea.blogspot.com) where there were
discussions about Barth's ideas on election. These postings caused me to wonder
about election as it relates to individuals with mental retardation. There are
those who would say that by virtue of impaired cognitive abilities, these
individuals have been elected and are on the salvation fast track. Interesting
that biological conditions could have such spiritual implications.

Let us assume two things, for a moment. First, that people are created by God in God's image. So when God tells Moses, "who makes the mouth of man" (Exodus 4:11) He is implying, "I made your mouth the way it is." In the case of Paul who asks for a disability to be taken from him, his "thorn in the flesh" God's response is "My grace is sufficient for you my power is perfected in weakness" (2 Corinthians 12:9). So first, people are made the way they are, they are not mistakes. Secondly, if people with severe cognitive disabilities are automatically saved by virtue of their impaired condition, a view held by some, then salvation efforts on our part are unnecessary (a reason I have been given at times for a lack of involvement by the church towards such people). Now obviously you may not agree with either of these propositions. Maybe you think disability is not an expression of God's creative range. You might also think that people with cognitive disabilities, particularly severe cognitive disabilities are not saved even though they have limited cognitive ability restricting their ability to respond to the gospel message. I will give you both of those points. I will give you that the issues I am describing in a very cursory fashion need much more research and thought.

However, if God has placed among us, people that He designed, who He plans to "save" simply by virtue of the fact that they have a limited opportunity to respond, well, it just seems to me that I might pay attention to those people in order to understand what God is telling me about Himself and about myself by putting people with such characteristics in our midst.

If people are not given a pass regarding salvation, then how would a loving and just God facilitate salvation for such people? Could there be a kind of a community component to salvation for such people? I note in the passage where the paralyzed man is lowered through the roof (Luke 5:20) it says "Seeing their faith, He (Jesus) said, Friend, your sins are forgiven you." Seeing the faith of those who lowered him through the roof, he forgives the disabled man of his sins. Very interesting. He doesn't say, "friend you are healed," he says "friend your sins are forgiven you." He does later say, "get up and walk" but only to illustrate that He has the power to forgive sins. So it could be that God is looking to us those around people with disabilities to show our faith such that even something as powerful as the forgivness of sins might be seen in another.

Finally, whether or not people with disabilities, particularly those who are born with disabilities are reflective of God's creative range, all disabled people are people who must be respected as people who are equal as people, who are loved as people, and who are valued people. I remember many years ago when a light came on for me that everything in the Bible that I cling to as a Christian applies equally to people who are disabled as well. I had so "othered" people with disabilities, that I didn't see the Bible as even applying to them. I think many people still do that today. They do that in their actions, they do that with their questions. A good friend asked me the other day "How do you deal with people with disabilities in counseling when they 'play games' in counseling using their disability as a crutch?" My response was, "How is that different from any other person who plays games in counseling? How would your response be any different for the person with a disability than any other person?" Can you see how that question sees a person with a disability as something different than just a person?

I have grown to believe that people with disabilities are designed to be as they are because they are critical, they are an essential part of the body of Christ. People with disabilities change the people around them and the enviornments around them, and I think those changes are far and away mostly positive changes. That is not all they bring to a social environment, but it is an important part of what they bring to a social environments.

So after 300 postings at this blog, I still wrestle with the questions I had at the beginning. But God is teaching me and I am gaining new insights. May God grow us all such that we see people as He sees them.

McNair
(fcbu)

The confrontation of disability

People with disabilities in the church will not allow us to be something other than something much more of what we should be. Not by specific efforts on their part, but more by their simply being. By them simply being themselves. If we want to be what God calls the church to be we can have them everywhere, or nearly everywhere, or we can be something that is not the church. We will be a church, but we will not be the church, at least not as the church God meant us to be. It will change us...we cannot be what we currently are, we cannot remain as we currently are. We will have to change.

How do we come to understand what it means that we have not yet changed? What do we do with the knowledge that inspite of knowledge about disability, we refuse to change? We can take an exhortation to heart and become something different, or we can kill the exhorter; even though he speaks to us in a righteous anger that strikes us at the heart of our traditions, at the heart of the way we have always done things, or at the heart of the way we have come to do things.

Jesus faced this question when he entered the temple at Jerusalem and saw all the money changers and sacrificial animals being sold. At face value, he might have said, "These church leaders are simply trying to make things easier for those who are here to worship." But he saw what was actually happening. He saw the sin that is so much a part of who we are that we are not able to see what we should be. We embrace our sinfulness to the point that righteousness is rejected because it not even recognized as it stands before us. What else could the reason be for the rejection of persons with disabilities? Particularly in the light of information about the treatment of people with disabilities by society.

In a whole variety of ways, people with disabilities confront people around them by their very existence. They cause changes in their environment, but only if the environment chooses to accept them. If they are rejected, no change is necessary.
A child with a disability is born and is sent to an institution.
A mother is pregnant with a child with down's syndrome and has an abortion.
A child is born with a disability and the father runs away from his family.

The church and its agents have to change...
A man with mental illness comes to a church and is rejected.
A girl with down's syndrome comes to a junior high youth group and is rejected.
A woman has a mild disability and is rejected by the Bible study.
Mothers of children with disabilities come to a nationally known Bible study group and are rejected. The leader is confronted but the rejection continues. Rejection not only continues... rejection is embraced by the leadership.

The confrontation of disability should cause change, and the change would move us in a direction which would lauded by God himself. Jesus would turn over the money changing tables and drive out the sheep. We gather the sheep up, set up the money tables again and kill Jesus.

McNair

Saving people in groups

I have talked elsewhere about the John 9 story of Jesus healing the blindman (see April 26, 2004 blog entry for one). However, I was touched recently by a passage further on in chapter 9. The blind man who was healed was being questioned by the church leaders.

24A second time they summoned the man who had been blind. "Give glory to God,[b]" they said. "We know this man is a sinner."
25He replied, "Whether he is a sinner or not, I don't know. One thing I do know. I was blind but now I see!"

This is really powerful to me. The blind man apparently did not know who Jesus was, but he is ready to come to his defense. Not because he had come to faith, or because he was convinced by some spiritual argument, but because he was blind and now could see. It strikes me that we as the church have missed a lot of such opportunities in the lives of disabled people. Not that they will necessarily be healed, but that we can be loving and caring to them. I can hear the following conversation...

"You know those Christians are judgemental and intolerant. They are
religious zealots and dangerous. They believe in a nonexistent god."
He replied, "Whether they are what you say or not, I don't know. One
thing I do know is that I was alone and now I have friends. I was excluded
and now I am included. No one loved me and now people love me."

That is the type of opportunity we are missing. Like my posting in 2004, the Glory of God is seen in what we do. "I don't know who their God is, but I am willing to find out because of what they have done for me."

Later, Jesus finds the man. Look at his response to Jesus.

35Jesus heard that they had thrown him out, and when he found him, he said, "Do
you believe in the Son of Man?"
36"Who is he, sir?" the man asked. "Tell me so that I may believe in him."
37Jesus said, "You have now seen him; in fact, he is the one speaking with you."
38Then the man said, "Lord, I believe," and he worshiped him.

I have known people with disabilities who have been accepted instead of being rejected. They have actually responded something to the effect, "Who is he so that I may believe in him?" That is the power of what we do when we reach out to rejected people. We help them to see the Glory of God in the way they are loved and accepted.

One other thing I note about this story is some of the things mentioned about the parents. It doesn't say that the blind man was begging. It just says that Jesus saw a blind man. Jesus says that the parents' sin was not the reason for the man's blindness. The parents tell the leaders,
"Ask him. He is of age; he will speak for himself." His parents said this because they were afraid of the Jews.
I find these three facts/quotations interesting. At least according to this account, the man must have been cared for somehow if he wasn't begging. Perhaps it was his parents. They were not the reason for his blindness due to sin, perhaps in the form of lack of attending to him as a boy, or abuse, or something else they may have done. Also, they say that he can speak for himself. Actually, he speaks very well for himself. I suspect this blind man when he was a blind boy was well cared for and taught well to be able to interact with the church leaders in the way he did. I also note, however, he knows what a prophet is (thats what he says Jesus is), and his response to the church leaders is very telling about his upbringing.

27He answered, "I have told you already and you did not listen. Why do you
want to hear it again? Do you want to become his disciples, too?"
28Then they hurled insults at him and said, "You are this fellow's
disciple! We are disciples of Moses! 29We know that God spoke to Moses, but as
for this fellow, we don't even know where he comes from."
30The man answered, "Now that is remarkable! You don't know where he comes from, yet he opened my eyes. 31We know that God does not listen to sinners. He listens to the godly man who does his will. 32Nobody has ever heard of opening the eyes of a man born blind. 33If this man were not from God, he could do nothing."

The church leaders didn't believe he had been born blind so apparently for whatever reason he was not really known to them. But he knows how to exactly hit their buttons by asking if they want to be his disciple and by the statements he makes about who God is. His confidence as a blind man must be from his upbringing. The limited knowlege he has about God must have come from his family. When confronted about their son, the parents are scared, however, it appears they did a pretty good job in taking care of their disabled son. He is cared for, intelligent, and self-confident.

Additionally, he was waiting, on some level, to be told who the Son of Man is so that he might believe in him. First, someone needed to get his attention by addressing the thing that had separated him from the rest of the community, his disability. Jesus heals him, but we can at the least, accept people and refuse to make disability their defining characteristic. We can love and accept people. One other thing, what do you want to bet that as a result of Jesus' intervention into the man's life that his parents who appeared to care for him also became his followers. That is something that we must remember. It could be that when you love and accept people with disabilities, people get saved in groups, as families who are desperate for acceptance for their children and themselves.

PS Happy Birthday Kathi!!

McNair

Teaching with pictures

In the movie Amistad, the story is told of how the African slave receives a Bible, and through studying the pictures learns the basics of the story of the life of Jesus (pictures from Hollywood Jesus website). Although there was a language barrier and a cultural barrier, the message could be shared via pictures.

I suspect this is perhaps one reason for pictures being placed in Bibles...they assist the reader to visualize the subjects of the text.

But what if you couldn't read at all? How might you be able to study the Bible? It occurs to me that the use of good pictures might be very helpful. Carefully selected pictures, be they photographs, or paintings could be taught as Christian study tools for people with learning disabilities to cognitive disabilities. Those who can't read, or perhaps can't even understand Bible passages being read, might be taught to study pictures.

Should a teacher choose to use such a strategy to teach Biblical content, it strikes me that there are several important points to consider. First, the picture will be THE Bible to the person studying the picture. If the picture is not Biblically as accurate as possible, people will misunderstand in the same manner as people would misunderstand if they read a poor translation of a passage. Biblical correctness must be ensured as much as is possible. Second, the picture should be detailed to teach subtleties of a particular part of the Bible. Henri Nouwen authored Return of the Prodigal Son, which is basically about what he learned from studying Rembrandt's painting, Return of the Prodigal Son. It is fascinating the depth of meaning he learned just from studying the painting. Third, the picture should be appropriate for the age of the individual using the picture as a Biblical study aide. We should avoid cartoons, or unrealstic representations because the unrealistic nature of the pictures will communicate that the story is perhaps unreal. Persons with cognitive disabilities are very much realists and therefore must be confronted with realistic images. They can be very sensitive to the age inappropriateness of materials used with them instructionally. Fourth, an engaging picture will bring in those in the enviornment to assist the person understand the meaning within the picture. If I am studying a cartoon while sitting at Starbucks drinking my coffee, people will think me juvenile. However, if I am studying a famous painting, people will be engaged by my interest, perhaps ask questions, or perhaps provide interpretations which might help me in my understanding, my study of theological concepts via the picture. Fifth, in the same way we help people to pray through scripture, we can help people to pray through the pictures, so again using the example of the Prodigal son, we pray to be forgiving like the father or we pray to be humble, or asking for forgiveness like the son. People's memory's are prompted with such pictures. Sixth, is the potential universal design benefits of the pictures. It is often the case that accommodations made for people with disabilities don't just benefit them. An example is curb cuts for wheelchairs. Curb cuts are also great for bicycles, or people who just have trouble stepping down from the height of a curb. Designed for wheelchairs, they benefit others. Teaching students to study pictures has the potential of benefitting everyone's understanding of the Bible in the way that it assisted a priest and scholar such as Henri Nouwen. (Return of the Prodigal Son picture from 123 posters.com).

I have actually used Return of the Prodigal Son with adults with cognitive disabilities with some success. I used the picture and taught them the story. I would then ask questions about what they learned using the picture as a prompt. People in the class would view the pictures and be able to relate various points I was attempting to communicate.

So I am hoping to see curriculum developed (not necessarily by me) that uses these and other principles to teach spiritual truth to those who would perhaps like to study to some degree, but are unable to do so because of their inability to read or listen to Scripture. Well chosen, carefully chosen, pictures chosen with consultation from someone like a church pastor to ensure they properly represent the passage being taught could prove very useful in teaching persons with cognitive disabilities.

McNair

"I don't pass to girls"

When my daughter was younger, she played basketball, and me being a father who wanted her to play and enjoyed her playing, would often coach her teams. I remember when she was maybe 9, I was coaching her team at the YMCA. It was the first game of the league. Amy was the only girl on the team. I remember that at the start of the game, she would often be open, waving her hands, but the boy playing guard on the team would not throw the ball to her. This happened several times, Amy open, but no pass. I finally called a time out, and brought the team over. I asked the little guy playing guard,

"Did you see that Amy was open under the basket?"
He said, "Yeah."
I asked, "Then why didn't you throw the ball to her?"
He replied very matter-of-factly, "I don't pass to girls."
"You don't pass to girls?"
"No, I don't pass to girls."
I responded, "Well we have a place for players who don't pass to girls.
It's called the bench."

Shortly after that interaction, probably before the end of the first half, he went back in the game and started to pass to the one girl on our team.

I believe there is a lesson here for us. In the game of YMCA basketball, you can pass to girls, or you can sit on the bench.

Fast forward 10 years. I had a conversation with a pastor who related that some of the people in leadership in the church, particularly people in leadership of small Bible study groups felt uncomfortable with people in their Bible study groups who were disabled, or didn't have perfect social skills. He wondered what he should do? I think the question was perhaps related to how he might limit the numbers of disabled people in a group, or change disabled person involvement in such a way that the leader didn't feel so uncomfortable. My response was that basically if you are a leader who can't handle disabled people, you probably shouldn't be a leader. You don't pass to girls, you get benched from the basketball game. You don't accept people with disabilities, you are disqualified from the leadership, you are benched.

Here is a further example.

OK, pick an ethnic/racial group, any ethnic/racial group. Imagine your leader coming to you and saying, "I don't like people from this particular ethnic/racial group in my Bible study." Your response would be:

a. "Yeah, I don't like those kinds of people either"
b. "You are benched"

Sure we could add another potential answer, like, we will provide you training before we put you in a position of leadership, or help you to get to know people, or whatever. That could be another option. But basically, the only responses are "a" or "b."

You might say, "But it is different if the people are disabled." I might even agree somewhat. There is no reason for people with profound mental retardation to be in the Bible study group. But anyone who has the potential to understand even minimal levels of the content should be there. Anyone who would benefit from the social aspects of the interactions could be there as well. But social skill deficits are not a reason for excluding involvement. Particularly if they are minor.

Unfortunately, the Christian church's response has too often been "a." Look at the involvement of people with disabilities in churches, look at the involvement of people with disabilities in Chrisitan schools, look at the lack of information shared about disability on Christian colleges, in departments of Christian ministry, in seminaries, look at the lack of sermons on disability that have been shared from the pulpit, look at the number of ministries to persons with disabilties at churches.

Matthew 23:23 says, "Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You give a tenth of your spices—mint, dill and cummin. But you have neglected the more important matters of the law—justice, mercy and faithfulness. You should have practiced the latter, without neglecting the former."

"Yeah, I don't like those kinds of people either"
Apparently, that is a statement some church leaders would attribute to Jesus Christ...

I think he would tell the leaders,

"Well, we have a place for leaders like you. It's called the bench."

McNair
(fcbu)

Being shrewd

The pastor of my church, Dr. Gary Inrig, gave a very interesting sermon last week about being shrewd (based upon Luke Chapter 16). I must admit that it was probably the first one I have ever heard on the topic, but it is something that more people should think about. One thing I have noted about Jesus himself is that he was shrewd in that he was never predictable. Just when someone thought they had him, he would come up with an answer or response that would totally surprise them. But he was not just clever in his answers, he was also shrewd.

We occasionally see Christians being shrewd. I remember when there was to be a huge Promise Keepers meeting in Washington D.C. one of the organizers was asked by an interviewer why Christian men should be trusted by women, be they Christian or not. His response was something to the effect, "You shouldn't trust us." The interviewers were surprised. "You should test what we say by what we do, by our actions." They were expecting some self righteous justification, he agreed with them and as a result, he scored points with them and the audience listening.

As I listened to the sermon, though, I must admit I got caught up in verse 15 of the passage. It says,

You are the ones who justify yourselves in the eyes of men, but God knows
your hearts. What is highly valued among men is detestable in God's sight.

Its true. We justify ourselves in the eyes of people, we look to the community for our approval too often, and at the very least, we look to the community for the methods we use in churches. There are too many business principles being applied to churches for my liking. Church growth can be come a formula. Finance campaigns can be slick. People are judged and valued on the basis of what they can contribute to the church. Jesus says that what is valued among men is detestable in God's sight.

So I should step back and look at my church to see the things that are valued by men as they might actually be detestable things. I might also reverse the proposition and step back and look at the things which we think are "detestable" or at least less desirable, or problem causing, or whatever our negative feelings are, and ask whether they might be something that God delights in.

Is the exclusion of people with minor social skill deficits (or major ones for that matter) something that is valued by men? Is is something that people typically do? Do churches, and pastors, and adults, and teens, and children reject people on the basis of social skills? Is this accepted practice in the church setting? It is definately accepted practice in the world of business or women's groups, or colleges, or high schools, or junior high schools, or elementary schools, or any other group. Social skills are definately something that is highly valued by people in the world.

But I want to be shrewd, by God's standards.

You know I have related this before in this blog, but I often wonder why I see the things that I do relative to people with disabilities and the church. I am not the sharpest tool in the shed as the saying goes, and I also guarantee you that I am not a particularly shrewd person. I amaze myself quite often with how clueless I often am. But I feel like I am an investor in the 1970's who has heard about this thing called Microsoft (I might have my years wrong, but stick with me). So I see this amazing opportunity. In this case it is not an opportunity to make money. It is an amazing opportunity to correct the course of a Christian church which has not been going in the right direction. It has been "off course" in many ways. I see this opportunity to be obedient to God in ways that the Church percieves as entirely new ways. I see this opportunity to really learn what love means through loving people who some consider difficult to love. I see this opportunity to serve people who haven't been served, and provide wonderful opportunities for service.

If you are shrewd perhaps you will see it too.

McNair

(fcbu)

Making their cry my own

Jean Vanier makes the following comment in his book, Community & Growth: Our Pilgrimage Together :

Often a community stops crying out to God when it has itself stopped
hearing the cry of the poor, when it has become well satisfied and found a way
of life which is not too insecure. It is when we are aware of the distress
and misery of our people and of their oppression and suffering, when we see them
starving and sense our own inability to do anything about it that we will cry
loudly to God: "Lord, you cannot turn a deaf ear to the cry of your people;
listen then to our prayer." When the community makes a convenant with poor
people, their cry becomes its own. (1979, Paulist Press, p. 124)

Obviously all people have problems of a greater or lesser degree. I find, however, that the problems of persons with disabilities are at times very difficult to solve. They can be difficult to solve for me personally, because to solve their problems implies a time committment on my part. I have to change my priorities to include them when I would rather take my ease, watch tv, or read a book. But I don't think I am called to take my ease as much as I would like when my brother or sister is in need. It truly is not about me. At least it is not about me, or should NOT be all about me, if I am a Christian.



But another aspect of this is that when I see human need, I also seen the insolvable nature of human need. Don't believe what the politicians or anyone else tells you...we will not be able to solve the problems of a fallen world because it is well, fallen. Sure I can help and I can lessen the pain of those around me by God's grace, however, I have come to believe that one of the reasons that there are people in need in the world is so that we will cry out to God. That we will seek God's wisdom, God's help for seemingly unsolvable problems. In my own little perfect life, with a good marriage, good children, good job, good income, good place to live and so on, I may loose the desperation of my need for God. I have become intoxicated by my blessings, and rather than look to the source of my blessings, or look to see if others have blessings or need blessings, I go home and watch the football game on tv. But bringing myself into contact with those in need, those who are alone, those who may even be suffering, reconnects me to my helplessness without God in this world.

This is yet another reason why the church needs people with disabilities. They have challenges in their lives and the lives of their families which can only be addressed by a cry out to God. We truly do "sense our own inability to do anything about it that we will cry loudly to God" if we are aware at all. We are brought to a point where we sit without the answers, in deep distress, calling out together to God. I think that is a place God wants to take me, to take us. He wants to challenge our securities with insecurities so that we will be forced to rely on Him rather than our own resources. He wants us to step back and look at our resources, be they emotional, intellectual or monetary and physical, and be a part of the solution for others.

When I am in an uncomfortable situation with a person with a disability because I don't have the answers, or can't communicate clearly, or am reduced to simply praying because I don't know what to do, I inwardly smile a bit as I recognize God is challenging me to cry out to him on behalf of this person. God is wanting to grow MY faith and the faith of the person I am attempting to support. Once again God has connected me to a hurting person and given me the honor to share in that person's frustrations.

But remember, the solution is not to reject those who make us feel uncomfortable. The solution is to get in there with them and share their experience, share their struggles, and perhaps make others uncomfortable through our allignmentment with a disenfranchised person. The typical response is to reject, to exclude because involvement requires change on my part or the part of the institutions I am a part of. The answer, however, is to work through the uncomfortable feelings, to reflect on them and understand them and to change with them as appropriate.



McNair

(fcbu)

Child find

Perhaps the most pivotal law in special education in the United States, is PL 94-142, the Education for All Handicapped Children Act. There are several important precedents that were set by the legislation, however, in order to serve the children with disabilities, they first needed to be found. One critical component of the law, therefore, was called "child find." I can remember posters that were placed around the community that said something to the effect, "Do you know a child with a disability who would benefit from a public school education. Please refer them to ..." and so on. So as the government got into the business of providing special education services it had to first find the children to be served.

Fast forward 30+ years. The church should be in the "child find" business when it comes to children with disabilities. There should be signs around our communities saying something to the effect, "Do you know of a child with a disability, or of a family with a child with a disability would enjoy worshipping at a Christian church? Come to --- church where you will be welcomed and embraced. We want you and your family member with a disability to feel welcomed, and loved. You have a church home!" How about that for child find? Better yet, lets just call it person find... "Do you know a person with a disability looking for a church home?" I plan to approach people at my church for permission to put such signs in my community.

You see, there are churches with disabled members. Some have become disabled during their tenure attending a particular church. Some people with disabilities will arrive at a church, and the church hopefully tries to figure out how to include those people.

I want my church to be one that recruits people that other churches do
not want to recruit.

I want my church to be the "child find" or "adult find" or just simply "person find" church. Let people start with us. We can then not only serve them at our church, should that be their desire, but we can also talk to other churches to get the other churches to serve those individuals as well. So if a person from the Catholic, or Baptist or whatever faith comes to my church, I can say, "You are welcome here!" If they respond, "I wish there were a Baptist church locally that would serve us" we can respond, "Let us help you to become involved in that church." We could then contact that church. If they are open, great. If not, the people are welcome to stay at our church untill the Baptist church in the community is more open.

Why did the state have to find children under PL 94-142?

Because the state hadn't been serving the disabled population in the public schools.

Why does the church need to find children, adults, people with disabilities now?

Because the church has not been serving people with disabilities.

People with disabilities and their families probably as a group think that they are not welcome in churches. For us to sit back and say that we would accept them if they came is insufficient. We need to demonstrate to them our change of heart through our efforts to ask them to come. We have to go to them. We have to ask them to come.

McNair
(fcbu)

More on social skills

I was doing some more thinking on social skills today (see Tuesday August 21). So last night I went with a friend to see the California Angels play. He had been wanting to go for a long time and once we got there, he almost immediately wanted to go home. I convinced him to stay till midway through the 5th inning, and of course after we left, the Angels exploded and scored 9 runs...oh well. At least he got the free blanket, an Angels baseball, and other free paraphenalia.

My point, however, was this friend of mine, a man with severe mental retardation, walked around greeting people the whole time we were at the game. In his somewhat difficult to understand speech, he would say, "Hello, how are you?" to just about everyone he passed. I must admit that I found that kinda refreshing, and most of the people he addressed were very kind to him as well, responding to his greetings.

By all accounts, he was evidencing a social skill problem, to use technical terminology, to darn much greeting. Obviously when you go somewhere, especially at a pro sporting event, you get in and get to your seat. You don't take the time to greet everyone you pass in the arena, it takes too long. Besides no one else is greeting everyone else that they pass. So my friend's friendliness was an example of poor social skills, according to societal standards, not mine, on his part. Instead of greeting and being friendly, he should have kept to himself and shut up. But his friendliness brought a smile to nearly everyone that he came into contact with. Sure they gave him the benefit of the doubt because he has a cognitive disability, but nevertheless, he didn't follow the rules with the result being that he softened those around him.

Think about it.

McNair
(fcbu)

Forms of faith expression

I have been thinking about the ways in which faith can be expressed by an individual. I was once an elder in a church, and when we would interview potential members, we would look for key phrases both positively and negatively. For example, if we asked the question, "If you arrived in heaven, why should you be let in?" we would look for responses like, "I believe that Jesus saved me from my sins" or "Only because of faith in Christ would I be allowed in" things of that sort from the positive side. Negatively, if someone said, "I have tried real hard" or "I have been a good person" these would indicate that the person didn't really understand the work of Christ, and at the very least needed some instruction on those aspects of the faith.

But what of the person who cannot communicate via words, spoken or written (see Jamie video below for written expression). What if they lack the cognitive ability to understand the work of Christ even to the point of saying that "I have done bad things and Jesus has forgiven me." How does one with that level of disability express faith?

Well, we don't allow anything to count as faith, but I think we should look for indications of faith amongst those people. First of all, God can be trusted in this whole discussion. He will love the people I am trying to love more than I can even imagine, so he is out for their best. I think I am wanting to affirm people at their level that they are expressing faith when they are expressing faith. This can get a bit wierd where we are projecting things on people. Where, for example, people make random statements, or speak incoherantly, or other random behaviors which those of us without disabilities take for expressions of something totally apart from what they might actuallty be doing. But there is a level of awareness that might be achieved by those who are helping people with disabilities in their faith, which can encourage and guide them.

I remember for example trying to teach a man with cognitive disabilities the Lord's prayer. In the beginning I would have him repeat the phrases after me. Each time the things that he said were unrecognizable to me as the statement I had just made. But then I began to realize that each of the statements was consistent and unique. So if I said, "Our Father" he would respond with an unintelligible, yet unique phrase which he would always repeat when that was the phrase he was to produce. "Who lives in heaven" same thing thing, unique and consistent phrase. I came to the conclusion that he was repeating the Lord's prayer, however, he was repeating it in a way that I could not understand due to his speech impediment, but I am sure was understandable to God. I have know others, however, who produced random statements in response to learing a Bible verse who I am sure had no idea about what they were saying.

Another aspect of this is the ability to respond to the degree you are able, or to the degree you have been given the opportunity to respond. So I know people who have grown to love coming to church. Sure there are social components to church attendance (which is obviously NOT the reason for many attending church who are not disabled), however, the desire to come to church, to be with other Christians, even to be in "God's house" are all evidences on some level of a faith committment. I have mentioned at other times in this blog Fowler's book on the Stages of Faith. There are stages I will probably never attain myself, however, there is a stage at which I am currently functioning, and hopefully I will grow in my faith. That is the same for persons with cognitive disabilities. We help them at the stage where they currently function and attempt to assist them to grow in faith. A critical aspect of this is I need to look for expressions of faith, not so I can judge, but so that I can reinforce and facilitate the spiritual development of those with disabilities.

McNair
(fcbu)

Report from European Society on Theology and Disability

This is my report on the first meeting of the European Society on Theology and Disability held at Schoorl, Netherlands this past week(8/29-3/31/07). The conference organizers were Dr. Hans Reinders and Dr. John Swinton, however, Dr. Reinders and his family were the wonderful hosts who made this a memorable event. Accommodations were provided at an organic beef and dairy farm where we stayed in tents, enjoyed breakfast together as well as evening discussions about the events of each conference day. The conference itself was held at a place called Scorelewald, a residential/vocational setting for adults with cognitive disabilities.

The first evening opened with a few comments from Dr. Reinders, followed by a skit performed by members of the L'Arche community of Amsterdam about the Body of Christ (1 Corinthians 12). This was followed by the viewing of a film about the life of Henri Nouwen. Throughout the performance and the film, I sat by Willy, a beautiful gal from L'Arche who knew of Henri Nouwen and became excited whenever Jean Vanier was mentioned, and her friend Ferd. Both folks only spoke Dutch and I speak English, but we were reasonably able to communicate. After the film, another woman from L'Arche was interviewed about the impact the Nouwen film had made on her the first time she saw it with Dr. Reinders interpretting Dutch to English. The evening ended and we went back to the campground/farm.

The following morning, we awoke, had breakfast and walked the 1 1/2 miles to Scorelewald for the beginning of the conference. Dr. Reinders introduced the day and Dr. Swinton and others acted as moderators. We learned that attendees were from England, Scotland, Ireland, Switzerland, Nigeria, India, Russia, America and of course Holland. It was a friendly, lively group of 32 attendees 12 of which presented. The day's schedule was two 1/2 hour sessions followed by questions, coffee break, 2 more sessions then lunch, 2 more sessions then coffee break and then 2 more sessions and then dinner. I had the opportunity to present after the morning coffee break after Dr. Herman Meininger. My topic was, "The essential nature of persons with mental retardation to the church."

After dinner, there was a short break and then a dramatic presentation put on by the residents of Scorlewald. About 200 people were in attendance. The play was entitled, "Happy Hans" from Grims fairy tales which included a great musical accompaniment provided by residents. Earlier in the day, we were given the opportunity to forgo a portion of our lunch time to tour a workshop that made musical instruments. I must say that these instruments (flute, lyre, drums, xylophone) were beautifully made and produced lovely tones. Similar instruments were for sale and were sold for as much as a thousand dollars. The workmanship was very impressive as was the fact that that people with severe cognitive disabilities were involved in making the instruments. Anyway, Happy Hans was well done and great fun, and many jokes were made later as Dr. Reinders name is also Hans!

The final day of the conference included morning presentations and a business meeting after lunch led by Dr. Swinton. Some good discussion and decisions were made. The next meeting of the society will be held in 2 years with the location tentatively planned to be Switzerland.

Friday evening ended with a delicious barbecue prepared by Dr. Reinders' son Jasper. There was much great discussion. Dr. Reinders and his family were lovely hosts. Through their efforts, the standard has been set very high.

My immediate reflections about the conference was that there were very different ways of approaching the notion of disability although there was a unity of heart. I was very interested to hear about Nigeria and the presenters' contention that the church is the answer to disability issues there. There was unanimity about the desperate need for the church to change. I was approached on several occasions for ideas about how to actually facilitate change. It seems there is much resistance in the countries represented.

The good news is that God is gathering change agents world wide. It is a small thing that 32 people gathered from 4 continents, but God uses small things. I am excited about the possibilities this society has for the future. I also know now that I have two years to work on my German!

May God bless and direct the Eurpoean Society on Theology and Disability

McNair
(The Jordan Shelter,
Amsterdam, The Netherlands)

European Society on Theology and Disability

Well, I am off to the first meeting ever of the European Society on Theology and Disability to be held in the Netherlands. The group was organized by Dr. Hans Reinders (author of The Future of the Disabled in Liberal Society which is a great book) and Dr. John Swinton of University of Aberdeen (see his article Building a Church for Strangers). If you have the inclination, please pray for this meeting, this new organization and the conference. I will provide a report here when I return.

God Bless,
McNair

Leadership in ministry to people with cognitive disabilities

Who should be in leadership of Sunday School classes or groups for individuals with developmental disabilities? Typically it is people without disabilities although there may be a few leaders among those with disabilities in the group. Perhaps someone in your group witha cognitive disability immediately comes to mind. Perhaps we have people on the leadership team, some with specific roles. Others participate in leadership meetings because their input is valued, but one could ask why they are participants any more than anyone else. I think we need to be sure that leaders are in leadership positions. I am also confident that we could hurt feelings if someone was not invited to be involved in leadership because we felt they were not leaders. For example, there are those who would feel that they should be at any and every meeting and that her comments are essential to the functioning of the group. Others, might feel they are just missing out on a good time. But if the meetings are for purposes of discussing the future of the group, truly leadership meetings and not just social outings, there will be exclusion.


Because some of our group at my church have cognitive disabilities, and I am in a position of leadership in that group, I do not have a problem excluding them from the leadership meetings, as their disability on some level limits their contribution there. That is a judgment on their leadership skills, and their cognitive abilities which would imply that they are not gifted for participation in leadership, or teaching, for example (Ephesians 4:11). Obviously, I do not say there was no place for those people, only that their options could be limited by their disabilities and that would be a determination made by people with and without disabilities. I for one, have never been asked to sing before the church, or to have involvement in financial matters of the church. I have no problem with someone telling me that I am not gifted for those activities of the church because it is true, I am not. I also do not feel the need to have people with cognitive disabilities present in leadership meetings simply for reasons of political correctness. There are those with cognitive disabilities that I love dearly, and that I enjoy long conversations with, however, they will not be holding a position of leadership in our group. People with cognitive disabilities have very much to offer the church, but because of their cognitive or other disabilities aspects of their service may be limited.

Another basic aspect of the disabled/nondisabled dynamic is that people with cognitive disabilities cannot help but look to people without cognitive disabilities for leadership. Every cognitively disabled member of the group at my church looks to a non-cognitively disabled person for leadership in areas such as finances, travel, work, relationships, spiritual issues, etc. I have no problem with that as well. That is our responsibility as those without cognitive disabilities toward our brothers and sisters in Christ who experience cognitive disabilities. It is, however, a fine line to try to walk.

In our group, we have in the past and will do a better job in the future, communicated that all of those without cognitive disabilities are in leadership, if only informally. We need to note that, support that and praise that. That aspect has been one of the greatest points of growth in our group, for example, over the past year. I want people to be considered leaders in the class because of the positive impact their informal leadership has on members of the group. Others have a very quiet role in the group, but are leaders nonetheless through the way they come alongside of many people to talk and encourage them, love and support them. Those without disabilities are often totally invested in the group, and I think would do just about anything we could ask for the group. In that way they are an important part of the leadership. We, as those without cognitive disabilities, are responsible to help those who are cognitively disabled. Those without, or with less severe disabilities enjoy the group for themselves, but they also see it as a ministry role in a much different way than those with more severe disabilities typically see their involvement. I want to encourage the ministry view without disparaging the attendance view. I mean, I participate in groups where I am largely the recipient of ministry and that is fine. The key is that all should have the opportunity to be on both sides of the ministry equation (givers and recipients) although leadership in ministry might not be available to all.

McNair

Sin and social skills

So, a person with a cognitive or emotional or mental disability approaches you. He stands too close to your face. He asks you questions that you think are inappropriate. He touches you too much. He doesn't get your hint that you are feeling uncomfortable. He doesn't understand your language indicating that you want to end the conversation. He will not let the conversation end. Finally you break away. When you get with a friend, you comment, "That guy is weird. He's a mess. He doesn't get it at all, he was like standing too close and touching me and couldn't take a hint."

The question is...who just committed the sin?

He doesn't get it, you do.
He is kinda flailing around in attempting to be loving and friendly. You aren't nor do you want to be loving or friendly.
He will talk about you as his friend. You talk about him as weird and how he doesn't get it.
He will look forward to a chance to talk with you again. You will avoid him in the future.
He will give you all the time he has. You will give time only out of some feeling of guilt.

So who is committing the sin?

It is amazing what we, what I will do or think about a person just because their social skills are not all they should be. The person is not being evil, the person is not doing wrong, the person just doesn't understand many of what are truly the subtleties of social skills. My response is to reject him and 90% of my friends and 90% of the church would probably agree with my rejection of him. We as the Church of the Lord Jesus Christ, condone, understand, accept, advocate, discuss, follow through on rejection of people with various disabilities because of their social skills.

May God forgive us.

Yet as I approach the Lord, of course my behavior is obviously perfect and my social skills are flawless. I have nothing to hide, and to the Lord, interacting with me is no doubt "a day at the beach!" How fortunate for him that he is able to be in my presence (being the Lord, and being omnipresent, he kinda doesn't have a choice but to be in my presence). I am confident that the three persons of the trinity do not huddle together and say to each other, "McNair is weird." Surely they talk about how fortunate they are to have McNair on their side. But you know, in reality God's interactions with me, and my prayers to Him are "a day at the beach" because the Lord loves me. He loves me not because I am "a day at the beach" but because out of his love he has chosen to make interactions with me "a day at the beach." He has chosen to make me feel like I am "a day at the beach! " In spite of all my problems, my sins, my poor social skills, my pride, the crap that is in me and circles me like flies because of the choices I have made, HE LOVES ME! You see that is the example he provides. He shows me, ME, as the example of loving someone who is difficult to love, and then He loves me.

Do you think he cares about the social skills of the person who bothers you? Please! No, he treats him like he is "a day at the beach" just as much as he does to me.

So do you get it? Social skills deficits are not sin. If I reject another on the basis of social skills, that is sin and I am the sinner. We, I, need to learn about love. True love is not easy. It is messy and inconvenient. It makes you feel uncomfortable. It makes demands on you. I pray that when I am put to the test, when God asks me to show real love to another human being, I will not be worrying about that person's social skills. I hope my concern will be whether I am reflecting the kind of Love that God shows to me. I pray that I will be worried about the sin I am tempted to commit by rejecting another person who God truly loves.

McNair

People with down's syndrome and Arthur Miller

A friend of mine sent me a fascinating link to an article in the Vanity Fair magazine. It is about the famous playwright, Arthur Miller (Death of a Salesman, The Crucible) and his inability to accept, come to grips with, the birth of a son named Daniel who had down's syndrome. This was apparently a particular surprise to many because of Miller's voice of morality. As Vanity Fair states,

The Denver Post called him "the moralist of the past American century," and The
New York Times extolled his "fierce belief in man's responsibility to his fellow
man—and [in] the self-destruction that followed on his betrayal of that
responsibility."

Yet, he struggled with the acceptance of his son.

The article is excellent reading. It is fair to Miller, I felt, yet still wonders at the decisions he made about his son and the relationship he had with his son. Clearly we are looking at the situation through 2007 eyes which are very different from those of the 60's and 70's. We must hedge in casting judgement at Miller's decisions, at least some of them, which reflected the recommendations of professionals at the time. Yet as the article tells, Daniel's mother, was qouted as saying about her visits to Southbury Training School,

Inge said, "'You know, I go in there and it's like a Hieronymus Bosch painting.'
That was the image she gave."

This is a good description of the institutions at the time.

God bless the older couple who took Daniel under their arms and loved and supported him. Apparently he now has a wing built onto their home where he lives.

The article ends with the following

Some wonder why Arthur Miller, with all his wealth, waited until death to share
it with his son. Had he done so sooner, Daniel could have afforded private care
and a good education. But those who know Daniel say that this is not how he
would feel. "He doesn't have a bitter bone in his body," says Bowen. The
important part of the story, she says, is that Danny transcended his father's
failures: "He's made a life for himself; he is deeply valued and very, very
loved. What a loss for Arthur Miller that he couldn't see how extraordinary his
son is." It was a loss that Arthur Miller may have understood better than he let
on. "A character," he wrote in Timebends, "is defined by the kinds of challenges
he cannot walk away from. And by those he has walked away from that cause him
remorse." (emphasis added)

Daniel, who "suffers" from down's syndrome as the story relates, "doesn't have a bitter bone in his body...he is deeply valued and very, very loved." How very sad for Arthur Miller. The lost relationship, the communication of no value to Daniel. God bless Daniel for his heart of forgiveness, and apparently irrepressible love for his father. As the article relates, who knows what plays were not written by a man the article states could be the greatest American playwright of the last 100 years. What great good he might have done in his own life, the life of his son and the life of his family. The article also gave me a new appreciation of Daniel Day-Lewis (I hated him in Gangs of New York, or I should say his excellent acting made me hate him!), who married into the Miller family and as the article relates is the "most compassionate about Daniel. He always visited him."

The Arthur Miller family is a famous family in America, but they are just another family in Daniel (their son's) mind. A family who he loves although he lives with a couple who loved him for who he was. A family like many families whose patriarch feared down's syndrome, probably would have aborted the child had the option been provided to the father. A family probably coming to grips with their legacy, informed, yet misinformed.

Why is it that we look back on situations such as the one with Daniel Miller, the son of Arthur Miller we look back with regret for what might have been. We judge Arthur Miller for not being a father to his son because his son had down's syndrome. We praise the family who came alongside of Daniel and took him in. But I suspect the Vanity Fairs of the world will also support abortion of persons like Daniel. They will blindly talk about choice, or those who "suffer" with down's syndrome, not knowing about what they speak. People who know other people who have down's syndrome tend to like them, tend to think they are nice people, tend to think they are loving people, tend to think they are friendly people. But in the future we may never know this because of our efforts to wipe out people with down's syndrome.

The article ends once again with the statement, "A character," he (Arthur Miller) wrote in Timebends, "is defined by the kinds of challenges he cannot walk away from. And by those he has walked away from that cause him remorse." Will the Christian Church walk away from the challenge of down's syndrome, the challenge of disability or with integrity will we say that we cannot walk away? If Arthur Miller committed a "crime" in his relationship with his son, it was a crime of reflecting society. Perhaps he went where the rest of society is going now. What is Vanity Fair's response for his taking this path? It is probably our response. It is lamentation, shaking our heads in sadness, and perhaps judgement. I doubt Mr. Miller had any notion that his relationship with his son would be the subject of a Vanity Fair article, or discussed by an obscure Christian blogger.

May Arthur Miller's name forever be linked with the term down's syndrome and the name Daniel Miller.

It seems that Daniel Miller was born and Arthur Miller saw down's syndrome not Daniel Miller. This should be a warning to me, a warning to all of us, lest we make the same error.

In our world today, Daniel Miller is anticipated. Daniel Miller is conceived, Eighty percent of Daniel Millers will be aborted. Down's syndrome was the challenge Arthur Miller walked away from, hopefully with remorse. Our society is running headlong toward the elimination of people with down's syndrome.

Lamentation, sadness and judgement will be the response of those in the future to what we are doing to people with down's syndrome now.

McNair

Wyatt, Doc and difficult friendships

I like to wake up on Saturday mornings and watch old cowboy movies. This past week Wyatt Earp was on. There are two scenes that struck me. One, is when Wyatt and Doc Holiday meet for the first time. Doc asks Wyatt, "Do you believe in friendship?" He responds, "Yes" and their friendship begins. The movie portrays scenes from that friendship over the years. At one point, Doc and his girlfriend Big Nose, get in one of their typical drunken fights where they try to kill each other. Wyatt breaks the fight up and and attempts to sober Doc up. As he begins to regain his senses, Doc says, "Its not easy to be my friend, but I will be there for you when you need me" or something to that effect.

Do you have friends like that? Friends it is not easy to be friends with? Some of my cognitively disabled friends are like that (I have a greater tendency to not work on relationships with nondisabled people if they are hard to be friends with for some reason). Sometimes helping my friends with mental retardation, being friends with them is "messy." They have problems that I can't solve, and they impolitely do not keep their problems to themselves. They tell me their problems, make demands on me, and expect me to help them or solve their problems. Even keeping in contact with them is difficult because they don't follow the social etiquette I am used to. They will call me at 11:30 at night or 6:30 in the morning. They will call me 7 times a day or everyday of the week. My response has been to tell them "Please don't call me after 10 or before 7 unless it is an emergency. I will also tell them, "Please just call me once a week just to talk." I have gotten to the point that I will tell them, "You have already called me once this week. Unless this is an emergency, I will talk to you later." I may even have to hang up after ensuring there isn't an emergency. It might seem unkind, and perhaps it is, but it is what I have come to. But I like the fact that others in my church are facing the same challenges in their friendships with the people with cognitive disabilities who attend our church. These individuals are now on their radar screen. They are also someone else who can be called once a week just to talk for a few minutes.

Some of the messiness of the friendship comes from the social skill differences of my friends with cognitive disabilities. Some of the messiness comes from differences in my friends' life experiences that I may not be not used to. My friends with disabilities have to deal with...

-Access (busses they reserve to take them places), and
-conservators (who may or may not be very interested in them, but
nontheless have control over their lives),
-unscrupulous people who sell them things (cell phones can be the biggest
pain)
-being alone except for people who are paid to be with them
-dealing with human services and human service rules (in other words, the
government)
-a lack of friends
-too much time and too few things to do
-and so on

In attempting to be a friend to some people, I find myself in the position of negotiating, or being in the middle, or whatever. They are not friends who I can call to come over, or meet for a ball game, who then go home and solve their own problems. They can be high maintenance.

The whole social skills thing is another aspect of the difficulty of some friendships. Some of my friends I am sure impact the potential of friendships with others. People I love have told me that friends of mine are "wierd." Those who are not afraid to be politically incorrect and tell me what they really think will sometimes say that, which makes me think that others with whom I am not as close probably think that as well, but just don't say it to me.

So as Christians, what do we do about this? Are we called to befriend those who are more difficult to befriend than the average person? Are friendships about us only? Do we befriend others to benefit them? Is friendship something that is easy? I must admit that I have at times asked myself Doc Holiday's question. I have wondered if I believe in friendship, or just friendship that is easy for me.



McNair

Website changes

Hello,
Well as you can see, I have been busily making changes to the website. I think this will in some ways be easier to negotiate than the old format. Hopefully you will feel the same way.

One cool change is that I am going to gradually upload a variety of video. Currently there is one about the ministry to persons with disabilities at Trinity Church in Redlands where I attend. This was just a kind of awareness video that was shown to the congregation. Enjoy. Others to come!
McNair

Description of a nightmare

A friend of mine is a man who attends my church. He is a big guy, about 6'1" and wide as well. He likes to work out. He has been attending the church for about 7 years. Yesterday at church he pulled me aside (true story).

"I had this terrible dream last night...it was a nightmare!" he said.
"What happened?" I asked.
"Well I dreamed that nobody in the church loved me anymore."
"Well, you know that isn't true" I quickly replied.
"Oh sure, I know that. Everybody loves me down here. It was
just a dream. It was just a nightmare."

I have had that nightmare, most often when I am awake, and it doesn't have to do with me personally per se. I am glad that for my friend it is only a dream and when he awakes he knows that it was just a dream. For too many people, however, the dream is that they have a place in church and are loved. The nightmare is when they are awake, when the reality of their situation where they are isolated and in need of love and companionship visits them again.

McNair

Call for papers: Inclusive Christian Religious Education

The following is provided FYI. the Journal of Religion, Disability and Health is putting together a special issue on Inclusive Christian Religious Education.

Call for Papers:
Thematic Double Issue Inclusive Christian Religious Education Among the many important aspects of congregational life are the opportunities designed to foster people’s spiritual growth; learn the teachings, practices, and expectations of the Christian faith; deepen their relationships with others traveling along the same journey of faith, and grow in their relationship with God. Indeed, most congregations strive to provide an array of quality religious education offerings to their members, including Sunday school classes, programs for children and youth, men’s and women’s groups, preparation classes (e.g., confirmation, membership), and small group activities. Yet, most congregations struggle with exactly what it looks like to meaningfully welcome and weave children and adults with developmental disabilities into these core aspects of congregational life. The largely cognitive orientation of most religious education activities can leave people with intellectual and other developmental disabilities participating only at the margins or excluded altogether. This special issue of the Journal of Religion, Disability, and Health will be devoted to the topic of religious education, exploring the myriad ways that congregations can thoughtfully support the full participation of children and adults with developmental disabilities (e.g., intellectual disabilities, autism, multiple disabilities) in the life of their faith community.
We are seeking to capture the innovative work being done in this area, to challenge congregations to see people with developmental and other disabilities as an integral part of their communities, and to articulate a vision of what their programs could and ought to be for all participants. To this end, we encourage submissions addressing, but not limited to, the following topics:
• New and innovative models for inclusive religious education
• Program approaches focused on specific age groups: Early childhood and elementary programs Youth ministry and youth groups o Adult programs and small group activities
• Curricular and pedagogical approaches that promote learning, growth, and belonging for everyone
• Analysis of the fit in using traditional educational approaches to providing religious education involving persons with or without various disabilities
• Strategies for designing and implementing religious/educational support
• Expanding participation in ‘rites of passage’ and other preparation programs
• Supporting the participation of children and adults with challenging behaviors, emotional disabilities and/or mental illness
• Empirical studies exploring factors that support and/or hinder the meaningful participation of children and adults with developmental disabilities in religious education programs
• Perspectives of people with developmental disabilities and/or their families on the importance and impact of inclusive religious education in their lives
• Effective partnerships among congregation leaders, lay volunteers, and the disability service system
• Approaches for preparing teachers and other lay volunteers for inclusive religious education
• Contributions and barriers of church “structures” to the inclusion of individuals with disabilities in religious education
• Exploration of the relationship between education and “faith development,” particularly for individuals who may not evidence “spiritual growth” in the same ways as other congregational members
• Examination and evaluation of the goals of religious education for persons with and without disabilities
Our desire is that this issue will reflect the range of pioneering ideas, creative approaches, and progressive responses taking place across diverse traditions within the Christian faith.

This special issue of the Journal of Religion, Disability, and Health will be co-edited by Dr. Jeff McNair (California Baptist University) and Dr. Erik Carter (University of Wisconsin-Madison). If you are interested in submitting to this special issue, please contact the co-editors to discuss your proposed contribution. We encourage you to contact us with specific questions about this special issue. The deadline for submission is November 30, 2007. Please consult the author instructions located at the website of the Journal of Religion, Disability, and Heath (see http://www.haworthpress.com/).

Guest Editors Jeff McNair, Ph.D. Dr. Bonnie G. Metcalf School of Education California Baptist University 8432 Magnolia Avenue Riverside, CA 92504 (951) 343-4489 telephone jmcnair@calbaptist.edu
Erik W. Carter, Ph.D. Rehabilitation Psychology and Special Education University of Wisconsin-Madison 432 N. Murray Street Madison, WI 53706 (608) 263-5750 telephone ewcarter@wisc.edu

Less honorable need abundant honor

...And those members of the body which we think are less honorable, on those we
bestow abundant honor. (1 Corinthians 12: 23)

So, a man with mental retardation lives for 60 years. He gets up in the morning, goes to a job, comes home, and spends time with friends or family, and goes to bed. This scenario is somehow different from people without mental retardation who get up, perhaps go to a better job by comparison (more responsibility, more money, etc.) come home to family or friends and go to bed. How is the life of the person who is a waitress or a mechanic or a teacher or a professor or a doctor different? Is the difference based upon how much money they make or their contribution to others? Distinctions are artificial.

So we react when "stay at home mothers" are regarded as less than working mothers. Then we decry the effect on children of poor parenting. If some salary figure is our criteria for life well lived, stay at home mothers are criticized. If well adjusted children are our criteria, then working mothers are criticized. The critieria we set will determine whether we are successful in the evaluation. But I must look critically at those inside and outside of the group I am evaluating if I am being honest. For example, the need to be served might be a criteria to elevate someone to inclusion (special honor) not only a reason to exclude.

Self-sufficiency, the Bible would imply, causes people to not trust in God, to think they don't need God. Yet how do we convince self-sufficient people that they need God? Perhaps we put them in situations where their presumed self-sufficiency is inadequate. Put them in situations where they are once again forced to trust in God and not in their wealth (for example). People in need, people who need to be served have the potential on many levels to teach us about faith. Those we think are less honorable might actually be worthy of honor for a variety of reasons.

1) through their own faith
2)through the way they cause others to try to reconcile disability and faith theologically and philosophically
3) through the service they demand (causing one to decide whether or not he
will serve God)
4) what are the essential elements of being human or being made in the Image of God
5) what is is that makes a life valuable or well lived
6) why should I or my life be considered more valuable than that of a person with a disability
7) God's soverignity
8) support within/among the Body of Christ

The ability to teach lessons about faith might require special honor.

So the giving of honor might be less an artifact of our simply being obedient (although that is sufficient reason) but might actually be due to people if we use the correct criteria to do the evaluation. In thinking about having honor or giving honor, we might define honor in the following ways (the first five definitions from Webster's Third New International Dictionary, 1966):

1. good name or public esteem
- so people may have no good name or receive no public esteem, but we would give it to them
- we give them a good name through our social capital
- we recognize their contributions such that they receive public esteem

2. a special prerogative
- so we give them special prerogatives in overlooking social skill differences in the same manner we would overlook the social errors of our loved ones
- we facilitate the opportunity to provide honor by giving the opportunities to make decisions about their own lives, rather than approaching with a we know best attitude

3. person of superior standing or importance
- we begin by recognizing as a person as having equal standing and importance
- recognizing strengths we may begin to see superior standing
- through relationships we may begin to see importance

4. one that is of intrinsic value
-we honor by fighting for the disabled person's intrinsic value, that is, value that is not determined by ability levels, etc.
-we honor by having a realistic picture of our own value, intrinsic or otherwise

5. an evidence or symbol of distinction
-we honor by giving the same symbols of distinction to those who are disabled that we would give to anyone
-we honor when relationships with persons with disabilities are no longer a symbol of distinction


Our society decides about what it will choose to honor and then honors it. We honor physical appearance and athletic or other abilities. The Bible calls upon us to think differently about what honor means. One distinction of being a Christian is that within the Body of Christ, we reject the worlds criteria for honor, and honor whom we choose to honor. Paul chides us to give special honor to those whom we would typically think are less honorable.

Perhaps there are things worthy of honor if we would see people through God's eyes, using God's evaluative criteria. Perhaps we are to treat those we think are less honorable with abundant or special honor because in the deliverance of that honor we will begin to see the honor we should have been giving but missed in the first place.

McNair

Disabled man / Christian man

As I have mentioned before, I have a friend, a man who uses a wheelchair who challenges me to think about many issues related to disability and Christianity. As he works through various issues in his personal life, he asks me what I might suggest, how I might counsel him regarding the various issues he is grappling with. On several occasions, he has asked me, "Why is it that the disabled person has to change and not the nondisabled person?" My response typically is "I am not speaking to you as a disabled man, I am speaking to you as a Christian man." I hope that is encouraging to him.

But I have been wondering lately, how does being a disabled man impact being a Christian man? Does being a disabled man change one's expectations regarding what that person might be able to be as a Christian man? Clearly if a person has a cognitive disability, has mental retardation, there will be some limits in terms of knowledge, or specific ability levels. However, I have known people with mental retardation who althought limited in some areas, were very gifted in areas of faith, forgiveness, loyalty, and love among other things. So on the one hand, to limit a person with a disability is wrong. I limit others at my peril, in terms of not being Christlike in my interactions with them. Because there is more to disability than just the outward signs of physical or mental disabilities, I must see those people as I see myself. I too have strengths and weaknesses, some related to differences in my abilities, some related to differences in my abilities, some related to my sinful condition. But overall, we are the same.

Now clearly, I cannot expect self-control from a person who is mentally ill, or emotionally disturbed. They may have the desire to be self controlled, but they lack the ability to be so. It is no different in a person with mental retardation wanting to read the Bible, but lacking the ability to learn to read. But I wonder whether there are other aspects of being a disabled man which may limit a person's particular abilities. Jean Vanier speaks of the wounds of persons with disabilities. Wounds which Wolf Wolfensberger expands upon, breaking them out into specific types of wounds. See the March 21, 2007 posting for more specifics on wounds. If I were to have a stab wound in the arm, you would hardly expect me to throw a baseball, or use a hammer. I might desire to do so, but I am unable because my wound has incapacitated me.

So thinking about the particular wounds faced by a person with a particular disability, I might find that that person would face limits due to his wounding. Wolfensberger talks about diminishing wounds, attempting to limit them to the degree possible. His goal generally is largely to simply limit the wounds a person has to face, out of caring, out of concern out of love. I, however, would also argue that as we work to diminish the wounds of our disabled brothers and sisters we empower them to grow in various aspects of their Christian faith. We enable them to forgive, we enable them to love, we enable them to do a myriad of things they would desire to do in order to be Christlike, but are unable to do because of the wounding they face.

In summary, we must work to diminish, to attend to, to love those who are wounded. In doing so, we literally heal the wounds that prohibit them from being all they can be as Christians.

McNair

Joni and Friends "Through the Roof" Summit

The Joni and friends organization are planning their series of 2007 (follow the link)
Joni and Friends "Through the Roof" Summit meetings to be held in Chicago in September and in Pasadena in October. These are great events that you should attend if you have any interest in disability ministry, or a Christian perspective on disability.

My wife Kathi and I will be speakers at the event in Pasadena along with many other excellent and informative sessions.

It is also obviously a great pleasure to hear Joni Eareckson-Tada speak. Last year she was absolutely amazing and powerful. I have had the priveledge to hear her on several occasions and of course on the radio. But she gave one of the most convicting and powerful presentations of issues related to culture, church and disability I think I have ever heard. Do not miss the opportunity to hear her and meet her.

McNair