A few comments on leadership

Throughout the years of writing this blog, I have at times complained about leadership within the church. In my Feb 4, 2006 entry, I spoke about the late Rev. Dennis Kingsland who told me that pastors were a bottleneck in the attempt to open churches to people with disabilities. Since that time I have often reflected on his statement. But there is more to the impediment issue than just standing in the way of ministry to all of God's people.

Leaders also need to set the example, from the pulpit. Perhaps pastors have not been congregational members for a long time, but a whole lot of congregational members listen to what the pastor says. They listen to what he says and what he doesn't say. That is why a periodic mention of individuals with disabilities is an important thing for pastors to do to recall these individuals to the congregation's mind, and to reinforce that they are valued members. In addition, brief comments can guide the congregation in their interactions, tell them how to interact.

In our group, the Light and Power Company, we have very loving dedicated people with and without disabilities who are involved in ministry to each other and as participants. Periodically, I remind all of us of what our standard is for the group. So I say to those who can be counted on to be involved in the ministry things like,
"Remember, we are always about acceptance."
"It is more important that people have access to me as the leader than it is that they sit quietly"
"We need to recognize that people are here for different reasons, and at times our focus will be the reason why others are here, and perhaps not the reason why you are here"
"We want to avoid shushing people and telling them to sit down or we will be spending all of our time doing that. Let's grow in our acceptance of people with social skill differences."
We also recognize that the class will not always be quiet, that conversations may be going on during a lesson, or during prayer which we learn to tolerate. We state that there is pretty much nothing that anyone could do in our group that would cause them to not be welcome.

I make these statements to the group to remind us why we are here, what our standards are, what we expect from each other in terms of forgiveness and tolerance and acceptance. If those who have to a greater degree committed themselves to such ministry need this type of reminder periodically, what about the regular congregational member?

One of my students shared in class the other night that she is the parent of a child with a disability and her famiily attends church. She related sadly, however, that every time she arrives with her family, it is almost as if everything stops while the people all look at her and think, "Here comes the Jones family." She wishes that just once her family would be welcomed like any other. To me that is a leadership thing. I think the pastor who must be aware of the feelings of this family and the larger congregation regarding this family should just say out loud, "I recognize that little Sally Jones can be noisy and disruptive. Rather than staring at her, how might we make the Jones family feel loved and accepted the next time they arrive at any meeting?" By addressing such issues head on, we not only communicate to the congregation that the pastor, the leadership wants those people accepted, but also to the Jones family that their acceptance is a priority for the leadership.

Imagine your pastor starting off a Sunday service someday saying something like, "We believe that this church should include all people with disabilities. That is one of our core values. Thus the rest is just logistics. We may not be able to do things the same way we always have, but we think that having people with disabilities among us is more important than maintaining our traditions." You know what? I would almost guarantee to you that the congregation would rise to its feet and give the pastor a standing ovation. You see, I as a congregational member am waiting for that sermon. I have probably been waiting for that sermon for the better part of 40 years. I pray someday I will hear it.

McNair